Thursday, July 6, 2017

On Top of Spooky Mountain

Pierre hit hard enough it brought both stars and tears to his eyes. He felt like he'd hit rock, fur, then rock again, all in the space of about three seconds. When he rolled to his right, hit yet more rock, then stopped, he felt grateful for about two seconds before he realized he'd probably just killed one of Elizabeth's llamas. He got up as quickly as he could under the circumstances, and tried to assess the situation. He was in a rectangular hole in the ground - deep enough to look like the cellar of a long-gone hut or cabin. In this cellalular depression was the recently-expired remains of a llama. Pierre could hear the trickle of blood from where it was bleeding out, most likely from a poorly-timed blow to its throat from above, most likely a falling body.

This was not going well.

Luckily for him, another scream pierced the night air.

Standing alone, in a dark pit with the corpse of a llama he'd just, through extreme bad luck and a dash of negligence, killed, Pierre let the sound of the scream wash over him and through him and away down the hill. He'd had an inkling of a doubt that it had been a good idea to come up this way alone. Now he knew it for a fact.

Yet, somehow, his only solution was to pick himself up and out of the pit and make his way, slowly but surly. towards the spot where the screams had come from.

"Sacre vert," he muttered to himself, and trudged on up the hill to his doom.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Old Crow went through all the local insects he'd come across in his travels throughout the Pumpkin King's lands. There'd been flies and mosquitoes, gnats and nymphs, the occasional bee, wasp and hornet, yes. Fleas, flies, moths. Centipedes, millipedes, and that once, in the caves under Ziggurath, a billipede. He shuddered at the memory.

Then he remembered what he'd just seen on the path. He shuddered some more.

What were a million dung beetles doing on the march? Where were they going? Why? Old Crow didn't like the fact that he had to ask these questions. He was pretty sure he wasn't going to like the answers, either.

The party found the other fork in the path and took it. It did indeed head straight up the hill. They were oddly silent as they made their way through the occasional patches of moonlight that filtered down through the trees. The droning sound of a million dung beetles on the march was a sound that unnerved and unsettled even the heartiest adventurer. The occasional scream piercing the night air only added to the tension.

Old Crow stopped suddenly and held up his hand, signalling the others to do likewise. Up ahead, a low, dark shape blocked the path ahead. It looked roughly llama-sized, and it lay at the edge of the last copse of trees before what appeared to be the hill's summit. The shape moved, undulated in silence. Had the llama found something? Or had something found it? The group tiptoed in tense unison to find out.

Pierre pulled himself out of the ancient basement with a groan. He had a fat lip, a sprained wrist, and very possibly a couple cracked ribs. He'd felt better, but now he found himself glad it hadn't turned out worse. He felt bad for the llama, of course, but as he turned to look down at the poor creature's corpse, he had no qualms whatsoever about being the one to emerge from the dark pit alive. When it came to 'him or me' situations, Pierre was firmly in the 'me' camp. He looked around. The hilltop was visible in the moonlight. All around it, scattered like a dropped bag of dice, large rocks, boulders and slabs of granite lay; as he began to make his way higher up the hill he could see some of the stones had been arranged, placed there with some (he assumed, naturally) infernal purpose. He picked his way carefully around and sometimes over them. Making certain not to fall in any more pits. As he picked his way between to particularly large slabs of rock, another scream pierced the gray nightscape. It sounded only a few yards away. Pierre froze in terror, and tried his hardest to wet himself as silently as possible.

Old Crow approached the dark figure cautiously. It did indeed appear to be a llama, but if it was, it was a horizontal llama - not the vertical kind he'd expected to find up here. He could see its fur moving with a kind of rhythmic undulation, a peristaltic motion heretofore unseen in the species. But as he drew closer, he heard the low, chittering sound of a horde of insects on the move. He motioned for another match, and as Lamont lit it, Lady Eris gave out a shriek of disgust. A black, flowing river of dung beetles was flowing up and out of the underbrush and into the open mouth of the dead llama. Its body quivered and moved unnaturally as the creatures wriggled their way inside the poor thing, moving about in an unnatural mass before exiting the carcass through the servant's entrance in the rear. The river of chitinous fiends then continued uphill, quieter, contented, until they disappeared in a fissure that split a large rock formation in two.

"Nope," whispered Eris.
"Nope, nope," uttered Elizabeth.
"AH, THE LIVELY ECOSYSTEM OF THIS HILL. HOW QUAINT," intoned Lamont.
Old Crow remained silent. There just didn't seem to be much to be said. The four of them moved carefully past the dead llama and broke out of the last of the trees to the top of the hill. Another scream rang out in the night. It sounded about fifty feet away, just over there past the figure crouched behind a rock.

"Pierre?"
(muffled scream)
"Is that you, Crow?"
"Yes! You made it up here unharmed!"
"Well, I wouldn't say that, exactly..."

There was another scream, and then some whimpering. Weapons drawn, the five of them rounded the last boulder between them and the sound. They were rather surprised to find the pale figure of man, stripped to the waist, chained to a large slab of rock that looked like a sacrificial table.

The man on it had obviously been gnawing on his own limbs, trying to escape. There was blood everywhere, and he looked barely alive. Only the slight heaving of his chest gave any clue that he wasn't a corpse. As everyone looked on in horror, the man sat bolt upright, and gestured madly towards the woods off to their right.

"IT COMES!" he screamed, pointing a manacled hand. A great croaking sound came from the dark wood; there was a sound like the cracking of branches, the rustling of leaves... Two trees parted, and emerging from the woods, to everyone's surprise...

A giant toad.

The man on the table screamed in terror before passing out cold. Old Crow eyed the toad with a great deal of suspicion.


It was not giant toad season in these parts.
























No comments:

Post a Comment